Saturday, June 02, 2007
some jokes to share...
employee A : i need help balancing my career with my personal life.
boss : i recommend a book called "No one will ever love you". It'll crushh your hope for a personal life & free up more time for work.
employee A : ...
employee A : i need tuesday off because my son is having his tonsils removed.
boss : Since when do you know how to remove tonsils?
employee A : err... i won't be doing the surgery myself.
boss : do you have a rare blood type you need to donate?
employee A : no, actually i was planning on sitting in the waiting room to give him moral support.
boss : so your kid is immoral & sick? he sounds like a real winner.
employee A : ...
employee A : & thats my design plan for the project.
boss : it reminds me of egyptian hierogyphics. are you sure they didn't patent it?
employee A : err... i don't think thats likely.
boss : but there is still some risk?
employee A : first of off, i didn't use egyptian hierogyphics. secondly, ancient egyptians didn't have microchips, thirdly, they didn't have patent laws.
boss : ohh ya? than how did they build the pyramids? do some research on that question & get back to us next week. next on our agenda, why do our projects take so long?
employee A : ...
employee A : i automated a task that used to take me 3 hours.
boss : well... well... well... isn't that just like you?
employee A : resourceful?
boss : lazy.
employee A : ...
employee A : did your just turn my brilliant accomplishment into a character flaw?
boss : complainer.
employee A : let's just forget the whole thing.
boss : quiter.
boss : i keep forgetting where i place my things.
doctor : the problem is that you are stupid. i recommend replacing your brain with a monkey brain.
boss : will that help?
doctor : no, i juz hate monkeys.
boss : come to my office for a minute.
employee A : what's in your office?
boss : you & me will be there.
employee A : if you just want to talk, we can do it right here in my cubicle. saves us both some time.
boss : maybe we need privacy. did you ever think of that?
employee A : do we need it?
boss : no. thats was just an example. there are many, many reasons why we should talk in my office.
employee A : i'll be fascinated to find out what kind of information is geographically dependent.
boss : now, do you have the results from the benchmark tests?
employee A : yup, in my cubicle... ( >:( )
6:42 AM...Peace
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